A Long Couple of Months

It certainly has been a long couple of months. I dont have many pics to post so you will just have to use your imagination.

Lets see...my last post was quite awhile go so I will start with November....

It started about Nov.9th. I got up one morning and I was so tired. I could barely keep my eyes open. I ended up going back to bed and missing my first classes. I did go to work but I would still take a nap in the afternoon and then go to bed at 8! this was so not me. I had been taking a new vitamin for about two months and they gave me energy and I was sleeping through that!
someone asked if I was pregnant. Yeah right. Very funny! Michael and I have been trying since our miscarriage and nothing so why on earth would that be an option now? Either way, I thought I would take a test anyway because I had a doctor appointment with my new doctor the following Thursday and I figured that I would rule that out as this appointment was for an infertility consult.
Imagine my surprise and shock when that pregnancy test immediately turned positive! I was shaking. I have never had a home pregnancy test come up positive before. I had to go get Jen to look at it because I couldnt believe what I was seeing.
After she confirmed the two lines that I was seeing, I didnt know whether or not I should be excited or cautious.
I told Michael when he got home and of course, he had to be Michael and asked me who the father was. The turd!
Monday I called the doctors office and let the nurse know that the appointment would need to be an ob appointment. That week I went in and Dr. Hardin ordered bloodwork for levels and he did an ultrasound. He also told me that in his office, if I have a concern, they make the time for me and not make me wait till they have an opening. I like this doctor. He also had me come back a little over a week later to do another ultrasound to look for the heartbeat.
In the meantime I was called to NC for an urgent family matter which I will not get into now. But I will ask that any reading this please pray for my sister and her family.

After I returned, I had my doctor appointment. Michael went with me and we had another ultrasound in which we saw a beautiful little heartbeat pumping away!
We are so excited.
I am having definite pregnancy symptoms as well. I have morning sickness which so far I have been able to keep at bay. I also have my cravings. Lately it has been cream of chicken soup, black olives, peanut butter sandwiches, Mcdonalds french fries, and chocolate shakes. I have totally gotten off the pepsi and mountain dew and thats because the baby just doesnt want it. I have a can and I feel sick to my stomach! I can handle ginger ale though. That actually helps calm my stomach.
A couple days ago, I had the apointment with the nurse which is called an OB workup. they take family history and go over tests that are done during pregnancy and also what happens during labor as to who will be the one delivering the baby. I am so blessed in that my new doctor leaves specific instructions for himself to be notified in the event that one of his patients goes into labor. I guess he prefers to deliver the babies of all of his patients. So come July when the baby is due, provided he is not on vacation, he will be delivering the baby. I have another appointment on Jan 8th. They will do another ultrasound to make sure baby is doing well and measuring on schedule.

That pretty much catches you up to date on things so far.
Its been snowing all day and is looking very pretty but I think that we are starting to get that snow that Oregon got. Its been coming down pretty well and there is already a couople inches out there. Really pretty.

Christmas Eve we will be going to Glade Park. I am concerned about the road conditions, but by that time, they should be clear and also, we have a four wheel drive truck which my husband knows how to drive very well. I trust him with it. Of course, by then, the roads should pretty well be cleared up. At least the worst of it. Christmas Day, Michaels mom likes to go skiing and I told him that yes I will be bored out of my mind, but he should go. He loves to ski. I will stay in the lodge and take some pictures of the snow and skiers and enjoy the fireplace they have in there. I also have a Nintendo DS and books to read as well. I will be ok. I am dreaming of all the hot chocolate or apple cider that I can have up there. Not to mention lunch! Yes I still get hungry.

Well that is it so far. I will update you all later, most likely after Christmas.

Election thoughts

Yes I was very disappointed when I saw or should I say heard the election results. We now have a terrorist as our next president.

No I do not like him. I have no issues whatsoever with his skin color but I do believe that he is opening up a 50 year issue that should not have been bothered. Obama himself is prejudiced against white people so how is his future treatment of us going to be fair?

Either way, we must remember a few things. The first is that God is in control. He knew who was going to be the next president and He is going to protect us. We are told in II Thessalonians 3: 1-3
"Finally,bretheren, pray for us, that the workd of the Lord may have fre course, and be glorified, even as it iswith you:
And that we may be delivered from unreasonable and wicked men: for all men have not faith.
But the Lord is faithful, who shall stablish you, and keep you from evil."

This tells me that no matter what, the Lord is going to protect us from the one who we know is evil.

In the meantime, we just need to keep praying.

The Opportunity of a Lifetime!

Ok well last night, Michael and I had the opportunity of a lifetime. Our very own nominee for Vice President, Sarah Palin, visited in Grand Junction. It was incredible! We arrived about 4:30 and it took awhile to get into the stadium where she would be speaking. We were trying to find seats and there were none. Michael finally found a section that we could go sit at but they said it was for military VIP only. I asked him if a sister and brother in law counted and he said yes but only if they were there. I told him that he wasnt there because he was in Iraq and the guy said, "Ok go on in!" It was funny. Ok so I have some pictures. I will try to label them as I go along but it never turns out right on the post so bear with me. Some are also really blurry but after a few pics I discovered that the lense was dirty. So I cleaned it and viola! A clearer picture! Enjoy! Ok this first pic is the stadium right after we got seated. Here is the flag.
This is the stage area where Palin would give her speech. Notice the walkway? That is where she will come out and walk down. Ok now here is where the good pics start. The one on the far left (unless the post doesnt post them right) is just the stadium all lit up. If you should zoom in you may be able to see her. The one in the middle you can definitely see Sarah Palin. And of course on the right you can see her as well. I believe the gentleman on the right of the stage in the pic on the right is Todd Palin and the little gal also wearing red is their daughter, Willow. The little sister, Piper is up there as well.


Ok this one is kinda dark but you can see Gov. Palin a little bit better.
After her speech which was EXCELLENT! by the way, Michael and I headed down to the infield where Gov. Palin was signing the Country First signs. Unfortunatly we didnt get an autograph, but we did get several good pics.
I still cant believe that she was really in Grand Junction and I got to see her with my own two eyes.About a month or so ago, Senator obama bin laden was in town and even though I think is a socialistic you know what, you have to admit that it still was a once in a lifetime opportunity although in his case it would have been a waste of time.


Well here she is waving goodbye. Her daughter, Willow, is to the left there and she looks just like her mom.

I love this picture and I would love to know where I can get one of those bumper stickers!

I have more pictures but I will have to post them later. I also got a couple of video clips. Thats right! I said video! Ok well I had better go. I will update you all later!

It's Friday!

Well it is finally Friday and I have homework. It never seems to end around here. I have a math test on Monday and a French test on Wednesday. I still have a little bit of homework to catch up on for math but I will get it done. I am going to try to get it done tonight so I will only have to do my French homework over the weekend. I still have to finish up a paper that I am writing and then I have lab stuff to do.

I have to say that learning French is quite interesting. There are so many words that are very similar to English words. The tricky part is that the French language refers to masculine or feminine when refering to things as well as people. For example, if a word ends in "ie" or "que" it refers to feminine. Here is one. This is refering to people though. If a man is an American, he would be Americain and his American wife would be an americainne. I think I have the spelling right. They also have masculine and femminine verb forms to go with the words too. It can be quite confusing at times.

Ok well I have more to write later. I still havent updated you on the air show and seeing the Blue Angels. I have pics to post of that!

Amazing Grace

Sorry it has been so long since I last posted but life has been busy. Lots has been going on like homework and stuff. I have been getting a little behind on my schoolwork but I am determined to get it all done since there is no school for the next two days and I will have some extra time.

I think one of the most exciting events of the past week was last Sunday night. My pastor is doing a lesson on evangelism and that particular night we discussed "false faiths" that people have. For example, if someone makes a statement that now they have accepted Christ, they can do whatever they want. Each of these "false faiths" have a title even though a few of them I cant remember. One I did remember was the one called the doubting faith. It describes the person who believes God and accepts him but has trouble putting full dependence on Him. That really got me thinking. Did anyone see the guy who hit me over the head with the 2x4? Yeah, you got it! I finally understood something that had always confused me and I made sure I confessed it all before I left church that night. I feel so good knowing that nomatter what it is, I can depend fully on Him for everything! I feel so much better now.

Well I am headed to bed because I am really tired!
Good Night!

Superstitions

I dont believe in superstition or horoscopes or tarot readings or any of those other mumbo jumbo things. I have often wondered if any of it comes true for people.
Earlier today when I was on the ovusoft website looking at the forums, I came across several expectant mommy posts and they all had these "Madame Zaritska" readings on their signatures. Curios, I googled it and found that Madame Zaritska was an "in house" clairvoyant for one of the baby websites like babycenter.com or something. Mere curiosity propelled me to check it out and see what it would tell me. What it told me gave me the shivers. It asked for a few simple questions such as favorite color and last animal I had looked at and stuff like that.
Here is the prediction it gave for my "childs" birth:

The day you deliver, outside will be blustery. Your baby will arrive in the morning.
After a labor lasting approximately 9 hours, your child, a boy, will be born. Your baby will weigh about 6 pounds, 13 ounces, and will be 20 inches long. This child will have green eyes and dark hair.
But there is more. Although you may feel tired, your pregnancy will be over before you are truly ready to let go of having this precious baby you have all to yourself. I sense that you will look back and long for these days. I suggest doing something now to preserve some memories of this time.

Michael and I lost our baby last halloween. The day was blustery. Kinda chilly but not fully windy. My pains started around 7 pm and continued until 4 am which is 9 hours. I was a 6 lb baby when I was born. I was also 20 inches long. Michael has green eyes and I was born with dark hair. The second line saying there is more is what really got to me; that my pregnancy would be over before I was truly ready to let go of having the baby to myself. Why does it seem that she is predicting my miscarriage??

Being Creative

I have always wondered how they made the neat little videos where you put pictures to music. My sister seems to be the expert at stuff like this so I asked her how and she gave me directions via instant messenger. I saved them and then I decided to make one. I had it perfect and when I went to convert it to a wmv file, the pictures were over in half the song time, so I spent what seemed like hours over my little project trying to figure out how to make the pictures stay longer so that the music and pictures would end simultaneously. I still have some playing around to do with it but here is what I have so far. I hope you enjoy!

Summer Fun!

I dont know about you, but sometimes its just fun to get out and do something. After church this morning, Michael decided that it would be fun to go out four wheeling with his sister and her husband and two kids. We got in the truck and headed out to Battlement Mesa, CO where the sis in law lives. We had a blast! We didnt hit too much of a trail, and their jeep started having some issues which are fixable, but it was really alot of fun getting some pics of the gorgeous mountains out there! It really gives true meaning to the verse in Psalm 19:1," The heavens declare the glory of God and the firmament sheweth his handiwork." Here are some pics of the mountains. Enjoy!

Just some random views. Sorry if they look like I am looking upward because I was sitting in the truck while taking them and the truck was moving!

There are alot of Aspen trees up there!This was one huge dandelion puff!

This is what you get when holding the camera lense up to the sky! Didnt turn out too bad!

This was after coming down out of the Aspen tree area. The mountains are absolutely gordeous up here!

When is enough, enough?

I give up. Children are not in my future. Could I be any more inadequate? Where did it all start?


When I lost the baby, I felt so inadequate. Like I couldnt do anything right. Its been 9 months since I lost my angel and I still cant conceive a child. My body wont allow it. I feel like I cant do something right. I would have rather not been pregnant at all than to have all this pain. I feel as though people dont care. I cant have a baby, I cant carry a pregnancy
Michael and I have talked about adoption. He told me he had a friend from college stop by his store and he was able to chat for a minute. I guess the friend and his wife are in the process of adopting their second child. He told Michael about the process and of all the hoops you have to jump through. Michael told me later that even though adopting would be great, he doesnt want to have to go through all those hoops. He said it wouldnt be worth it. As to if it would be worth it, I think otherwise, but I cant handle all those hoops. It will be just another person telling me that I cant have a child and that I am not good enough.

Hello Again!

Hello all!! Its been awhile since I last posted. I have had two posts since then but on the one, the video uploader kept freezing and on the second one, my picture didnt want to post, so I will have to just go on from there.

Today, Michael's cousin flew in from Hawaii for her grandparents anniversary. We will be going to meet with her family on Sunday.

I am currently trying to put some music on blogger but I am not sure how and when I looked up a site that offers free music players for blogger, it said it decided to close its doors so I have no idea how to do it. Any suggestions on this one?

Last Monday, a little dog was hit by a car in front of my house. The poor little guy was fine. He was not hurt, just a little shaken up, so I took him in the house and later he went to the backyard. He was a pomeranian mix and sooo adorable. He was quite the energetic little fellow. I put an ad in the paper and had it broadcast on the radio but no luck finding the owner. A coworker loved him and decided to take him home with her. Hey I had no problems with that!

In a few weeks I will be going to North Carolina to visit my sister and I am so excited. It will be soo cool to see her again. She has my new violin and I cant wait to get into practice once again. Maybe this time I can learn vibrato!

Well I have to be off as I need to get to bed soon. I have to be up at 5:30 and I am hoping that I am not sick again tomorrow as I was today.

Prayer and Supplication

Well it has certainly been awhile since I was on here. There is not much to tell. I started a new job which I like. Its not the best job in the world, but it pays the bills. It has also been helping me establish a good sleep schedule. I have to be up at 5:30 and I go to bed at 10:00.
On another note, Michael and I started our second round of Clomid today. I am not thrilled. I never thought I would need to be on any kind of fertility drug. I dont understand it and I probably never will but what I am trying to learn is what God wants me to learn. I dont know what that is yet. I happen to be a member of a ladies forum and we were on a conversation thread on asking God for things. Is it selfish to ask God for a child or not? I did some searching, and what I found is in the book of Philipians chapter 4, verse 6:
Be careful for noghti; but in every thing by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God
And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shal keep your hears and minds through Christ Jesus.
This tells me that we CAN go to God with our requests. It also tells me in the beginning of verse 6 that we are not to worry: be careful-for what? for nothing! We are to not worry, but make our requests known to God. Continuing on in verse 8:
Finally, bretheren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatseever things are lovely, whatsoever things are aof good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things. Thos things, which ye have both learned, and received, andheard, and seen in me, do: and the God of peace shall be with you.
I have often wondered why these verses come one right after another. We are to make are requests known to God in prayer and then we are told to concentrate on these things as long as they are honest, just, pure, lovely, true, and of good report. And at the end? Peace.
In Ephesians chapter 6 verse 18 we see prayer and supplication again:
Praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, and watching thereunto with all perseverance and supplication for all saints.
I looked up supplication in Easton's Illustrated dictonary and I found it to mean beseeching the Lord or pouring out the soul to God. Its not just a simple prayer. Its fervent! A quote from this dictionary says this about prayer:
prayer must also be offered in the faith that God is, and is the hearer and answerer of prayer, and that he will fulfil his word, " ask and ye shall receive" and in the name of Christ.
I hope that this helps to understand a little on how one must pray. I hope that I can start to pray more fervently and with more faith. I want a child so desperatly and like Hannah, I need to make my request known to God.

Contentment

I have often wondered about contentment. I know that true contentment comes from God himself but there are a few things that I find that make me feel quite content.

Last Sunday, I had the opportunity to go to a friend's baby shower. She had her son, Riley, two months early. She had gone to the hospital because she had a migraine but just felt different! While at the hospital, she was tested for preclampsia, high blood pressure and stuff like that but nothing showed up on the specific test. It was while she was there, that she suddenly had a seizure. The baby's heartbeat wasnt found and she was rushed to emergency C-section. She miracle is that both she and the baby made it just fine and are both doing well. Riley only weighed 4 pounds and was in the hospital a week. He is home now and doing just fine.

Tonight my friend Jen and I got to go see her and the kids and we had a blast. Belynnda allowed us to take pictures (oh yes I got tons!) and post them on here, so here are a few of them.

While I was holding him, I got a sense of contentment and I allowed myself to wonder, just for a moment, if this was what it felt like to hold your own.

As you can see, Riley is absolutely adorable! He is at 4 lb 7 oz now and his tiny feet are about an inch and a quarter long. I certainly cant wait till God blesses me and Michael with a little miracle of our own!

Spot got a bath!

Well this evening Spot (our furbaby kitty) got a bath. Or should I say that the bath was more of an attempt. I had the wonderful opportunity to get this one on video. Enjoy!

Hiking Adventures

Yesterday I was looking for a tape measure and instead found something else that had been missing: my cd case with all of my picture cds in it. I found my pictures of Bangs Canyon in them. Yay! For those of you who have never really been to Colorado or who have but didnt know the secret hiding places, I am going to share these pictures with you. Bangs Canyon is a canyon (duh) is in the Grand Junction area. Its west of the city sort of in the National Monument, and you have to go up a back route to get there instead of going straight up the Monument.

Last April, me and my best friend, Jennifer, and her boyfriend Brandon, went up there. Of course we brought Trent and we had so much fun that we had to go back the next day. This time we brought Michael who has this natural tendency to dress like a tourist. Its pretty funny watching him. One of the interesting traits of Bangs canyon is the old Mica Mine. Its really neat to be in a half cave of Mica surrounding you. Oh to take some of it home! Unfortunately, taking some off the ground is considered illegal. It would figure I come home and find Trents pockets full of it! Boys will be boys.

Ok now for some pictures. Hope you enjoy them!
The first three are at the beginning of the canyon. Isnt it a gorgeous site?

In the third picture, you can see a little bit of red. This is the Indian Paintbrush that grows naturally up there.

One thing I love about hiking is the little streams and brooks. They truly do 'babble' to you as you are exploring! And then there are little boys who naturally have to be in them!

And there are also lizards! This one I shot a picture of while he was quite happy just sitting there.

Here is Trent again. Notice where he is standing: little boy + water = mud. Yes, he did get a bath as soon as he got home!! After the barbecue of course.

Hi Jen!!

Jennifer doesnt really like to smile for pictures. Occasionally I can get her to do it.

Oh look! Its two boys in the water. The bigger little boy is Brandon. He and Trent were having fun with squirt guns they had brought along.

Here is Brandon again. I am sure he is up to no good!

This is another lizard only he just happens to be much fatter than the other ones. What was funny about this one was that when we first saw him, he was doing push ups on the rock. Literally!

This view was simply breathtaking! It was when you first come out of the canyon and start to go into the Mica area.

This is where the 'road' seems to change. Notice the contrast of the glittery white with the brown. This is how you know the Mica Mine is right around the corner. Literally sinces you go over a little hill and directly to the left is the mine.

Here is a rare shot of a tourist..oh wait...thats Michael.

If he were to go to another country,he would have absolutely no trouble looking like a tourists, although he may scare other tourists away.

Boys, touri..ahem men and water!!!

Ok. I am small, have four legs, a tail, and I camouflage very well. Can you find me?

Here are some better views of the mine itself. Michael and Trent are in a little 'cave' thing that is really neat.

Here is the mine from the right hand side. It has more trees and stuff surrounding it. Notice how it seems to be almost like a half cave.

Ok time for a panoramic view. The other one is of the larger cave that you can climb up. The rocks are really sharp too! I felt bad for the poor dogs that were there.

That is one happy dog!

After we visited the Mica Mine, we decided to hike a little farther to see what we would find. We found what appeared to be a series of mini waterfalls and some rocks that had a steep incline. Of course the boys had to check it out so we girls had to follow.

Ok well thats all the pictures for now. I hope you enjoyed them. I will try to get some more pictures of Trent and birthday party he went to today posted tomorrow.